ARE YOU ANGRY?

IF SO, YOU NEED TO READ THIS INDEPTH REVIEW ON WHAT ANGER IS AND HOW IT AFFECTS YOU

Anger is one of the most misunderstood and overused of human emotions. First, anger is a reaction to an inner emotion and not a planned action. Second, anger is easier to show: everyone gets angry. Third, the feelings
underlying the anger reaction make us feel vulnerable and weak; anger makes us feel, at least momentarily, strong and in control. Fourth, angry behaviors are learned over the life-span and therefore can be unlearned and replaced with healthier patterns of coping. Fifth, anger can be an immediate reaction to an isolated event or it can be a response after numerous events. To repress anger is unhealthy and yet to express it impulsively, as we so often do, may give momentary relief but inevitably will carry negative consequences. To alter our angry responses, we need to
understand from where it comes. There are a variety of factors that increase the probability of an anger reaction. First, if we have seen our parents get angry first and resolve an issue after, we are more likely to use the same approach. Thus, types of anger are learned. Second, if we are frustrated and feel stressed, we are more likely to react with anger. Third, if we are tired, we are more prone to react in an angry fashion. Fourth, if we tend to hold our feelings inside rather than talk them out, we are more likely to have an angry outburst as the pressure increase much like a pressure cooker.

Styles of Anger

Each of us develops their own special style of anger:
The “Mad Hatter” Driver: This person yells, curses, and offers gestures to other drivers when s/he is in a hurry and frustrated.
The Sulkers: This person shuts down in a chair and stops speaking and looking at others.
Safe Haven Abuser: This person takes her/his frustration out only on the ones s/he loves.
The Distracter : This person disregards the object of his annoyance by reading the paper, forgetting to run an errand, or playing the radio too loudly. When s/he is confronted, the response is: I didn’t know; I forgot; I’m tired.
The Blamer: This person blames everybody for everything and rarely accepts responsibility for his own short comings.
The Avenger: This person believes s/he has been given the right to seek vengeance in any way for anything by using the excuse: they deserved it.

Anger Check List — How Is Your Anger? Check off each selection that applies to you.

o People tell you that you need to calm down.
o You feel tense much of the time.
o At work, you find yourself not saying what is on your mind.
o When you are upset, you try to block the world out by watching TV, reading a book or magazine, or going to sleep.
o You have trouble going to sleep.
o You feel misunderstood or not listened to much of the time.
o People ask you not to yell or curse so much.
o Your loved ones keep saying that you are hurting them.
o Friends do not seek you out as much.

Scoring: add up your selections and see how you did.

0 - 2 MANAGEABLE you could benefit from relaxation training
3 - 5 MODERATE you need to learn more about what stresses you, and learn stress management techniques .
6 + OUT OF CONTROL you have an anger problem that could benefit from learning anger management techniques

Conclusion
Anger reactions have been likened to a train running out of control and about to derail. A little anger can motivate us to take action in positive ways. A lot of anger will make us red with rage. Anger that is out of control will drive away those whom we love the most and endanger our employment

AND

THERE ARE WAYS TO STOP YOURSELF BEFORE YOU BLOW UP

How To Get A Hold Of Your Rage Before Your Rage Gets a Hold Of You

You know how you have those weeks (or we’re the same humans we were 300 years maybe months or years) that just seem ago. But look at how things have changed in to be loaded with stress? that short time. Some things make life easier It takes a million years for one gene to now: washers and dryers, transportation, change in our bodies. One million years! I’m abundance of food, electricity, etc. But some bringing this up because, physiologically, things make life today more insane: cell phones, traffic, increased population, fake food, TV, busy schedules. I heard a statistic
from a doctor-friend that we make more decisions in one day than people used to make in a year. No wonder we’re stressed out and reaching for candy to cope.
All this craziness and high-speed living isn’t going away. Since we can’t change our genes, we have to create a map to navigate this crazy life. What can you do to try and stay on top of the stress so it doesn’t affect
your health, happiness, or waistline?

Exercise. Thank God for endorphins. If you have to work out, then go take a brisk walk and get that blood flowing. It isn’t about working out to lose weight — it’s about being healthy and staying sane. Eat the real stuff. Bad food (fast, pro cessed, and loaded with sugar) doesn’t help your chemical brain and body handle stress. Living food, real food,
helps support your mind and body while it’s trying to deal with the million things coming its way. Every time you reach for the chocolate, you’re looking to feel something from it. Don’t get me wrong — if it’s just a little here and there because you enjoy the taste of it, great. But if you’re using it the minute you feel overwhelmed, then that’s when that food is no longer OK to eat. It doesn’t make the problem go away, and then you just feel bad about eating the food to pacify yourself. Grab green food instead. Put things in your mouth that are going to support your immune function and keep you levelheaded. Notice. Try not to let the stress overtake you. Recognize the situations that cause the stress and notice them coming your way. You have a better shot at fending off the full effects of the stress when you can anticipate it.
Get it off your chest. Talk to a friend or partner about the stress. Sometimes just getting it off your chest can help unload some of the burden.
Keep your sense of humor. If you do have the chance to talk about it, try to see the irony and humor in the wacky bits. I think someone is dead in the water once they lose their sense of humor. Stay grateful. Make a habit of saying thank you. You will notice the sunny spots a lot more often, and not just the gray skies and storms.

Ask, “What’s the hurry?” Have some fun. We’re always so busy going somewhere, we miss just enjoying the moment. If an opportunity comes your way to do something fun, take it. Take a deep breath. When you feel the
stress getting to you, take a moment. Get away, even if it’s just for an hour, to be with yourself and your thoughts. Some people like to take a walk, meditate, lock themselves away in a beautiful bath, or go to church. Find the peace and the silence. Keep it simple. Simplify where you can.
Do you really need to be in 78 activities?
Do you have to go to every little gathering you’re invited to?
Turn off the TV. A lot of it is bad news anyway, and it robs us of hours that we could use to get other things done. Since everyone complains that they have no time, get some by unplugging from the tube.
Sleep : If you’re rested, you have a better shot at handling things. Not to mention, you may not stress out as easily if you have a chance to recover at night.
Drink water : Hydrate with water. Help you entire system function better just by drinking enough water. Oh, and by the way, if you don’t think that weight loss and proper hydration have a relationship, think again. Don’t think about exercise and nutritional eating just as something you have to suffer through to get into those jeans. Instead, think of them as armor that will protect you in this crazy world, with all of the details you deal with every day.

Salam
Thank U dear Renik for sharing such a nice topic.
May God bless U.
Sahba

woow salam dear renik realllllllllly valuable post & i'll print it inchallah , you know what sis, i needed this post really few days ago :Dtake carefi aman Allah

sahba wrote:Salam
Thank U dear Renik for sharing such a nice topic.
May God bless U.
Sahba

Dear Sahba
Thank you my beloved sis for passing
May Allah reward you
Renik

drmedicine wrote:woow salam dear renik realllllllllly valuable post & i'll print it inchallah , you know what sis, i needed this post really few days ago :Dtake carefi aman Allah

Thank you ever so much for passing & kind words
Are you joking dear ? you ? getting angry ? COME ON , I can't believe it
May Allah bless you